Our Descent into Chaos or Bedtime!

Tonight was a doozy.

I've got bedtime duty for both boys on Monday and Wednesday nights so Rose can work. Most nights, it works out great. I set Vincent up with his Nick Jr. or Playhouse Disney computer games, which occupy him unfailingly for the 10 minutes it takes for me to put Pete to bed.

It didn't work out so well tonight. Vincent was incredibly tired after a long afternoon with Mom-Mom so he wanted to go to bed when Peter did. I told him that would be fine if he laid in his bed quietly while I gave Peter his bottle and held him briefly, per his routine. It was clear from the start that this wasn't going to fly. Vincent wanted full attention and asked if it would take "longer than one minute" to put Pete down.

Well, we tried and after a minute or so (hey - at least he's true to his word) he hopped out of bed and buzzed around the rocking chair, trying to get me to put Peter down as I got increasingly upset. I tried everything from, "Mommy will be so mad when she hears about this," to "I'm going to count to three. One. Two. Two and a half..." You know - the techniques you hear your parents say that you don't ever think you'll use...until the desperation is so intense you can't think of anything else. It's all just rote.

No luck. So you can see where this is headed.

That's right. I yelled. And it wasn't your standard yell. It was more like a roar. I don't even remember what I said. Probably something to the effect of "GO. TO. BED!!!" OR "STOP IT!" but to Vincent and poor innocent Peter, it sounded like, "BLAAARRGGAAAAHHHHHHAAARRRRR!!!!!"

And that did it. Vincent erupted into tears saying, "You're scaring me!" Peter erupted into tears, in my arms, in a complete state of shock as if to say, "What the hell did I do to deserve this?! I'm just trying to go to sleep!"

And I felt like complete shit. Everything broke down into chaos. The bedtime process was a failure. We all went downstairs and sat on the couch for a minute to regroup. Vincent all puffy eyed and questioning. Peter all puffy eyed and 75% asleep/terrified. Me sweating bullets planning my next move. After a minute or two I just thought to myself, "Just embrace this moment, go with the flow and we'll see what happens. Try to be zen."

Cut ahead 45 seconds to the rocking chair, me holding Peter, with Vincent sitting on my other arm, hovering over us, like a silent eagle waiting for the moment when I'd put Peter in his crib, giving him his father to himself so he could go to bed.

It's failures like this that show me what I still have to learn and that parenting is an ongoing process. Just when you've got it all figured out something changes, rendering you reliant on your instincts, both good and bad.

I can sum it up with the one line Vincent said while we were taking our brief respite downstairs, "I want Mommy to put us to bed."

The Lion Brothers

This is from about 6 weeks ago, but that doesn't diminish its awesomeness. This was one of the few times my attempts at having Peter take part in the roaring actually worked. Nowadays, he'll do it at the drop of a hat.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

Cool photo taken by Kyle at my grandmother’s 80th birthday party a couple of weeks back...

I can almost hear Vincent saying, “YOU KNOW WHAT DADDY?” It’s a speaking habit he’s picked up somewhere, most likely from me. He says it maybe 30 times a day as an introduction to whole host of questions and statements.

“YOU KNOW WHAT? Willy Wonka’s hair is soooo curly.”

“YOU KNOW WHAT? I want some granola.”

“YOU KNOW WHAT? I’ll go to bed after we read one whole book and have some milk.”

“YOU KNOW WHAT? How long is the ride to Auntie Kate’s house?”

“YOU KNOW WHAT? (pause) YOU KNOW WHAT?”

“YOU KNOW WHAT? Let’s play computer games.”

"YOU KNOW WHAT? Uncle Kevin dressed as a clown one time."

"YOU KNOW WHAT? I don't really like salad."

“YOU KNOW WHAT? Peter is standing on that chair and he's stinky.”

I could go on. The frequency and versatility of its useage is pretty awesome.


That’s what.

Our Quotable Sons

While on vacation, both of my sons gave us great submissions for Kids Say the Darndest Things, The PG-13 Version.

From his seat in a popular Ocean City breakfast spot, Peter was watching cars and trucks go by and letting us and everyone around us know about it. He would shout his own word that doubles for both "car" and "truck", which is kind of a combination of each. What was the word he was shouting?

"COCK!"

Full-voiced and clear as a bell.

"COCK!"

For all to hear as they ate their pancakes.

"COCK!"

And boy did he see a lot of cars and trucks outside.

Later on in the trip, Vincent, Auntie Kate and myself were playing a game where Kate and I would volley a giant ball onto the beach house's porch from the front yard, and Vincent would throw it back overboard. Unfortunately, after an errant throw, the ball pierced itself on some kind of razor sharp plant and tore open, rendering it useless.

So later we're walking with my parents to get ice cream and we pass a house with similar plants in it's front yard. Vincent stops suddenly, turns to my Mom and says,

"MOM-MOM! BE CAREFUL! THESE ARE THE KIND OF PLANTS THAT CUT YOUR BALLS!"

In more ways than one, buddy.

Beachcombers

I had a whole paragraph written about how much fun our annual Ocean City trip was but I have a feeling you'd rather just see the pictures. Honestly, I think they do a better job of showing the highlights.

Change is Good

We’re still in the process of making our new home into our new home. We’ve still got boxes and stuff sequestered in certain spots throughout the house, and when Rose has time during the week between containing two young boys and taking clients, she digs through.

She decided to collect all the change we’ve been keeping in Tupperware and random tins and turn it in for paper money. Guess how much it totaled?

$91.00.

Am I crazy or is that ridiculous?! We had nearly a hundred bucks just lying around the house in change. Is this weird?

What did we use it for? Well my friend, I can hardly wait to tell you. It was very exciting.

Groceries for the beach.

If you think $91.00 is a lot of change to have around the house, please comment as such. If you think it’s pithy and a waste of a perfectly good blog post, please tell me that as well.