Truck Accident

A couple of weeks back, we attended our local Touch a Truck event. You may remember (or you may not) me writing about this a couple of years back. I went on a tirade about clowns. Still hate 'em, by the way. So the gist of Touch a Truck is this - tons of local civil service, construction and labor companies park their coolest trucks in a giant municipal lot and kids can climb all over them. It's great, cheap fun. No, I'm not writing about this as an excuse to show you awesome photos. I'm writing about it because it directly relates to one of the great early traumas in Pete's life.

The night he got his penis caught in a truck.

No, not a real truck thankfully. A toy truck. Here's the deal. It was about 7:30 PM and he was playing with his toys, naked. This isn't an uncommon occurrence. The boys take baths and like that time to prance around freely before being confined in their PJs. I mean, who wouldn't? This is the time before they learn self-consciousness so it's our job as parents to encourage behavior like this.

So he's playing with his trucks, naked, in a corner facing the fireplace. I can only see the back of him from across the room. Suddenly I hear an odd sound and I turn to see a pretty wicked pre-cry. You know, like a "JESUS CHRIST WHAT DID I JUST DO?" moment before the pain strikes? This was the moment he realized that a small portion of his penis had gotten stuck around the tire of one of his small, motorized toy trucks.

Then the screaming starts and I run over to see what the deal is. The issue is immediately apparent and I quickly decide to remove him from the cramped area and into a more suitable operating environment. Upon laying him down on the couch, I'm trying to figure out how to deal with this. Pete's screaming, Vincent's hovering, Rose is trying her best to help but I'm freaking out as much as Pete is. Empathy and all. After about 30 seconds that felt like 30 days, I wound the wheel back, releasing the tiny imprisoned piece of Pete's boyhood. The relief in the room was palpable and after a bit of ice, he was a new man. No blood or permanent damage. The kid's got one tough...erm...situation.

There's no moral here other than the obvious one - don't get your motorized toys near your penis. Even today, the kid remembers it well. He raced a little car across the kitchen floor saying, "Watch out, Daddy. You don't want it to get your peesh."

Lessons learned.